Wednesday, July 20, 2011

What I've Learned from Living in France

  • Middle school students are demons who really like the soothing sounds of Usher and disobeying authority figures.
  • How to finally tell military time without first staring at the numbers for two minutes too long, like an idiot.
Yeah, I'll take it.
  • The Provence region and the South of France are incredibly charming and the perfect location for my fantasy dream cottage and/or château. Fantasy vineyard optional.
  • Fois gras is the best thing in the world.
  • Frog legs are not.
  • If you're not from New York, California, or Las Vegas, French people don't care where you're from.
  • If you're a size 8 in the US, you're a size 39 in European shoes.
  • 90% of the French population firmly believes Miami is in California. They will not believe you when you try to convince them otherwise.
  • Marseille is actually French for "anticlimactic." 
Me in front of Château Chenonceau
  • Which French monarchs built castles where
  • How to craft a lesson plan LIKE A BOSS
  • Jack Daniels is incredibly expensive, as if it were a fine brandy. Though equally disgusting to me, those of you who enjoy fine brandy may feel a little cheated at the cost of imported Jack.
  • How to duck awkward, cross-cultural advances
  • Trains are incredibly cheap for people with the "Under Age 25" card. Some stores even have under 25 discounts.
  • How to walk in heels in snow
Wine tasting in the Loire Valley
  • How to taste wine (Smell, swirl, smell again, and then taste first in the front of your mouth, swallow, the back of your mouth, swallow, and then in the back with your mouth slightly open to let the air hit it.)
  • How to say tampon in French
  • That I cannot survive without Mexican food. At all. For longer than 3 weeks. It was a pathetic show of endurance in the face of faux-hardship.
  • All the words to "Celui," by Colonel Reyel:

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